01/27/17

seeing you

makes me hate myself

much more than i ever have

knowing youre perfectly okay

without me in your mind

but with her instead

as much im hurting

i hope youre happy

without me

because another second

of your poison lips

on mine could kill me

even if i want it

so badly, i cant

for myself

 

im sorry how we ended up

im sorry how i turned out

sad

lonely

missing you

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01/17/17

im scared for myself

because i do not know

if i will ever be happy again

it doesnt seem like i am meant

for this planet

for anyone to love

i wonder as i watch couples

if someone will ever love me

then i realized

that no one could

ever love a girl like me

no one will ever love me

like i have lovecd

because ive loved so fucking much

to get nothing in return

except a notification saying

this person is not receiving messages from you at this time

but thats nothing compared

to he heart wrenching feeling

i get every time i think of you

or see your name

or hear your name

 

all i can ever feel

is worthless

01/15/17

why do i wish it was your hand

keeping mine warm

as my fingers tingle in the cold

i long for yours touching me

maybe they are but sadly

i did not ask for them

to be wrapped so tighlty

around my fragile heart

 

please let go

let me go

i no-longer wish for you

to be keeping me warm

i want you gone

i want you forgotten…

why cant i forget you

 

…like you’ve forgotten me

01/05/17

in many different forms

we are the same

same sad eyes

same sadness inside

we share the same love

for boys and caffeine

maybe because deep down

we know we cant be saved

but we’ll drown ourselves

in things that make us empty

 

same big smile while we laugh

same thoughts

same need to be needed

in many different ways

i have found myself thinking

we are the same

 

 

 

 

12/26/16

the soft touch of your skin on mine

send electricity up my spine

the warmth of your hands

on the back of my neck

the thought of you with a new girl

now my head is just a blur

time was tick tick ticking

slipped through my fingers like you

it felt like there was fire

burning a hole in my chest

with you gone

i cant rest

left with my thoughts

thinking this is what’s best

it was always about you

but i guess you were through

i hope you’re happy

i’ll be thinking of you

cause you never leave my mind

how i wish you were mine

 

i’m sorry.